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Lum & Abner: Classic Small-Town Comedy artwork

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Lum & Abner: Classic Small-Town Comedy

Presented by lumabner

Step back into the heartwarming world of Pine Ridge, Arkansas, where Lum Edwards and Abner Peabody run their general store—and get into all kinds of hilarious misadventures along the way! Lum & Abner: Classic Small-Town Comedy brings you the best restored episodes of this beloved Old Time Radio show, featuring the quick wit, charming banter, and homespun humor that entertained generations.

Join Lum and Abner as they navigate small-town life, dream up ambitious schemes, and share the kind of laughter that never goes out of style. With crystal-clear remastered audio, accurate episode details, and cast information, this is the ultimate collection for Old Time Radio enthusiasts and new fans alike.

Subscribe now and experience a piece of radio history—one episode at a time!

245 episodes

  1. Lum Learns of Renting Store

    Nov 4, 2026 · 12 min

    Originally Aired: March 18, 1940 Lum #271, "Lum Learns of Renting Store," Excitement builds in Pine Ridge as a Hollywood film company prepares to shoot a picture in town. Lum has been enthusiastically showing a location scout around, and the prospect of movie stardom has already gone to his head. As Abner and Grandpap discuss at the Jot 'Em Down Store, Lum has been dressing in fancy clothes, studying acting books, and impersonating everyone from Englishmen to Kentucky colonels to Frenchmen. His friends worry he's losing touch with reality, trying out different accents and personas all over town in preparation for his big break. However, trouble is brewing that Lum doesn't know about yet. Squire Skimp has convinced Abner to sign a lease renting out the store to the film company for their production headquarters. Abner reluctantly agreed but hasn't found the right moment to break the news to his partner. As Lum enthusiastically discusses the picture and the Hollywood stars coming to town, Abner and Grandpap nervously anticipate his reaction when he discovers what's been done behind his back. The store that Lum assumed would be his stage may now be out of his control entirely.

  2. Squire Skimp Rents Store

    Nov 3, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: March 15, 1940 Lum #270, "Squire Skimp Rents Store," Excitement fills Pine Ridge as word spreads that a Hollywood motion picture company is coming to town to film a movie. Abner mans the Jot 'Em Down Store while trying to arrange a fishing trip, when Squire Skimp drops by with questions about the production. The talent scout Mr. Rosen has promised prominent roles for Lum and Abner, with plans to feature the store and other local landmarks like Uncle Henry Lunsford's property and the picturesque picnic ground down by the river. Abner mentions that Lum has been acting strangely, spending their store earnings on flashy Hollywood-style clothes and parading around town in checkered coats and yellow knickers. Squire Skimp suddenly presents Abner with an unusual business proposition: he wants to rent the Jot 'Em Down Store for twenty-five dollars a month, while allowing Lum and Abner to continue running it and keeping all their profits. When Abner questions how the Squire could possibly benefit from such a generous arrangement, Squire deflects and pressures him to sign an agreement immediately, warning that the offer might disappear if Abner waits to consult with Lum.

  3. Movie to Be Shot on Location

    Nov 2, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: March 13, 1940 Lum #269, "Movie to Be Shot on Location," excitement grips Pine Ridge after a Hollywood talent scout suggests the town would make an ideal setting for a motion picture. Lum has gone completely Hollywood before even receiving a firm offer, practicing dramatic scenes in the store, telling tourists he's a movie actor, and studying railroad timetables for the trip west. He's even paying off debts and collecting accounts in preparation for the big move, much to the bemusement of his partner Abner, who watches Lum's theatrical preparations with skeptical concern. As word spreads through town, everyone wants in on the action. Cedric Weehunt hopes to be hired as an actor, while Grandpappy Spears is already negotiating his salary, insisting he won't work for less than his current pay of forty-five cents an hour. Abner tries to keep a level head, reminding everyone that the scout only said he thought it was a good idea and would talk to the studio, but Lum has already transformed the tentative possibility into a done deal, complete with costume changes and overwrought rehearsals of melodramatic scenes.

  4. Movie About Lum and Abner

    Nov 1, 2026 · 13 min

    Originally Aired: March 11, 1940 Lum #268, "Movie About Lum and Abner," A Hollywood talent scout has arrived in Pine Ridge hoping to sign Abner's wife Elizabeth to a movie contract after reading about her heroic capture of three bank robbers. However, after meeting Elizabeth in person, the scout discovers she doesn't fit the young Western heroine type he envisioned. While the scout waits in town for his car to be repaired, staying as a guest at Abner's house, he finds himself charmed by small-town life and attends church services, delighting in the friendly community atmosphere. Meanwhile, at the Jot 'Em Down Store, Lum becomes increasingly wistful about missed opportunities for stardom. He laments his natural acting talent going to waste selling navy beans and lard, convinced he could be making hundreds of dollars a month in Hollywood. Lum reminisces about a school play from years past and fantasizes about getting his face lifted to pursue a movie career. The irony isn't lost that while the big-city scout wishes he could trade places and enjoy Lum's peaceful small-town existence, Lum dreams of escaping to Hollywood glamour and fortune.

  5. Lizabeth’s Fame Grows

    Oct 31, 2026 · 15 min

    Originally Aired: March 8, 1940 Lum #267, "Lizabeth's Fame Grows," finds the peaceful town of Pine Ridge buzzing with excitement after Elizabeth Peabody, the new chief of police, single-handedly captured three bank robbers. The nationwide publicity has transformed her into an overnight celebrity, complete with colorful newspaper headlines like "Poker Face Peabody" and "Lucky Liz Lassos Lawbreakers." Her husband Abner finds himself relegated to the background, fielding constant phone calls and being referred to as "Mr. Elizabeth Peabody," a situation he definitely doesn't relish. Over at the Jot'em Down store, Abner complains to Lum about his wife's newfound fame and increasingly exaggerated stories of her heroic deed. When Lum suggests that Abner could manage Elizabeth's business affairs and mentions a stage offer of $100 a week, Abner bristles at the idea. Despite the five-hundred-dollar reward and Elizabeth's plans to buy a full cowgirl outfit with pearl-handled pistols, Abner remains skeptical of her abilities and adamant that he won't have an actor for a wife, even as Lum playfully suggests Abner could join her act.

  6. Capture of Bank Robbers

    Oct 30, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: March 6, 1940 Lum #266, "Capture of Bank Robbers," In this episode, the all-woman city government of Pine Ridge faces its first major crisis when three bank robbers strike the county seat. Elizabeth Peabody, the newly elected chief of police and Abner's wife, has taken it upon herself to track down the desperados single-handedly. She's been missing in the mountains for two days with only Abner's beloved hound dog, Old Blue, as her companion. Down at the Jot 'Em Down Store, Abner frets over Elizabeth's absence, though his concerns seem divided between his wife's safety and the welfare of his prized hunting dog. When a wanted poster arrives offering a five hundred dollar reward for the Waldron brothers and Charles Sherman, the situation becomes even more tense. Lum tries to keep Abner focused on Elizabeth's safety rather than the dog, while young Cedric stops by and recognizes one of the outlaws from the poster. As they discuss the dangerous situation and the substantial reward money, Cedric mentions Greasy Coal Summers and a location that might be key to finding both Elizabeth and the bank robbers.

  7. Bank Robbers in Pine Ridge

    Oct 30, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: March 4, 1940 Lum #265, "Bank Robbers in Pine Ridge," In the aftermath of a stunning political upset, Pine Ridge reels from the election of an all-woman government, led by Mayor Melody and Police Chief Elizabeth. Lum and Abner gather at their store to commiserate with the defeated Squire, who is outraged that newspapers across the region are mocking their town as "Girlstown" and "Petticoat Government." The Squire declares Pine Ridge a laughingstock and threatens to leave town entirely, bemoaning the disgrace of having women in positions of authority. The situation becomes personal when Abner expresses his embarrassment over his wife Elizabeth, who parades around town wearing a police badge and two revolvers strapped to her sides. When the newly elected Mayor Melody calls the store asking Abner for advice on how to run her office, he refuses to help, arguing that since the women were so determined to take over, they should figure it out themselves. As tensions mount and the men's resentment grows, the Squire warns that Pine Ridge faces a potential crime wave with only women to enforce law and order.

  8. Big Election Held

    Oct 30, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: March 1, 1940 Lum #264, "Big Election Held," Election day arrives in Pine Ridge, and the stakes couldn't be higher as the men and women of the town face off at the polls. Lum and Abner anxiously await the vote count at the store, with Lum running for mayor against the women's ticket led by Melvie Moots and Mamie Seastrunk, while Abner finds himself in an uncomfortable race against his own wife Elizabeth for chief of police. The tension stems from Lum's failed attempt to break up the Women's Protective Association by spreading gossip, which backfired when the women discovered his scheme and gave him a beating. As the votes are being tallied, Squire Skimp arrives with confident predictions of victory for the men's ticket. He reveals to the increasingly nervous Lum and Abner that he's ensured their win through some questionable methods at the polling booth, having every man in town vote twice. While both Lum and Abner express reservations about winning through such tactics, Squire convinces them it's for the good of Pine Ridge to keep the women out of office and disband their protective association.

  9. Women Gang up on Lum

    Oct 30, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: February 28, 1940 In Lum #263, "Women Gang up on Lum," Lum Edwards believes he has discovered the perfect strategy to win the mayoral race in Pine Ridge: divide and conquer the female opposition. With three women running against him and his ally Abner, Lum has been calling his opponents Elizabeth, Melvie Moose, and Mamie Seastrunk, falsely telling each that the others have been insulting them. His scheme appears to be working brilliantly as the women begin fighting among themselves, with Elizabeth and Melvie feuding at the front gate, and Mamie actually getting into a hair-pulling fight with Sister Simpson at the post office. Feeling confident in his underhanded tactics, Lum plots to stir up even more trouble by targeting Sister Simpson, a community leader who could swing votes. He plans to tell her that Melvie has been criticizing her singing voice, which she is particularly sensitive about. However, when Lum calls to execute his scheme, he discovers that Sister Simpson is attending a meeting of the Women's Protective Association at the schoolhouse, a development that may signal his carefully laid plans are about to backfire.

  10. Stir up Trouble Among Women

    Oct 30, 2026 · 13 min

    Originally Aired: February 26, 1940 In Lum #262, "Stir up Trouble Among Women," Pine Ridge finds itself in the midst of a political battle of the sexes. The Women's Protective Association has forced the regular village officers to resign and put up their own slate of candidates. The men have convinced Lum to run for mayor against the women's ticket, but Abner faces a particularly awkward situation when he discovers his opponent for chief of police is his own wife, Elizabeth. His anxiety grows when he spots her practicing with a pistol behind the barn, though Lum tries to reassure him she's just preparing for the duties of office. Squire stops by to discuss campaign strategy and reveals that the men are facing an uphill battle. Many husbands want to vote for Lum and Abner but fear their wives will find out, especially since women will be serving as judges and clerks at the polls. The trio scrambles to develop a winning platform, with Squire insisting they need something sensational to win this fight and prevent Pine Ridge from falling under what he dramatically calls "marital slavery."

  11. Election Will Be Held

    Oct 30, 2026 · 15 min

    Originally Aired: February 23, 1940 In Lum #261, "Election Will Be Held," the battle between the Men's Protective Association and the Women's Protective Association reaches a critical juncture. After the men were locked out of their homes and forced to agree to let the women run Pine Ridge's civic affairs, all the town's male officers have resigned. Now Squire Skimp arrives at the Jot-em-down store with an urgent mission: convince Lum to run for mayor against two female candidates. Lum is reluctant, fearing he'll be humiliated by losing to a woman, but the Squire paints an alarming picture of what could happen under "petty-coat government"—men might be forced to become nursemaids and cooks while women run the businesses and pass ordinances pushing men out of public life entirely. When Abner joins the conversation, the men discuss their predicament. Since all the married men in town have pledged to support the Women's Protective Association, finding votes seems impossible. However, Squire points out that voting is secret, and men might vote differently than they promise their wives. As they debate who could fill other civic offices, the question remains whether Lum will take the plunge and run to "save the town" from female leadership.

  12. Women Want to Take Over

    Sep 3, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: February 21, 1940 Lum #260, "Women Want to Take Over," finds Pine Ridge in turmoil after the wives have locked their husbands out of their homes, forcing a joint mass meeting between the Men's Protective Association and the newly formed Women's Protective Association. Lum and Cedric discuss the situation at the Jot'em Down Store as Abner returns with news of the meeting's outcome. The men have been thoroughly defeated, agreeing to disband their organization and support the women's group in exchange for being allowed back home. Even Squire Skimp's objections were voted down by the desperate husbands. The women, led by their president Moses Moots' wife, have decided to keep their organization permanent and are demanding equal rights while working to improve the town. As Cedric heads back to avoid Captain Caleb's wrath at the blacksmith shop, the conversation turns lighter as Lum contemplates sending a Valentine to his sweetheart Morty Brooks for George Washington's birthday. This leads to a humorous mix-up as Lum confuses the story of Washington's cherry tree with the tale of the three bears and Little Red Riding Hood.

  13. Abner and Grandpap Unhappy

    Sep 2, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: February 19, 1940 In Lum #259, "Abner and Grandpap Unhappy," the battle between the sexes in Pine Ridge escalates as the Women's Protective Association locks their husbands out of their own homes. Abner finds himself crammed into a tourist camp cabin with Caleb Weehunt and three other men, suffering through sleepless nights filled with snoring and card games. While Lum remains unaffected and profits from the increased business at his tourist camp, Abner grows increasingly miserable, longing for home-cooked meals and his own bed. The situation takes a turn when Lum mentions the women holding the men's "feet to the fire," which sends Abner into a panic about literal foot burning, recalling a traumatic hot foot incident at the barber shop. Despite Lum's exasperated attempts to explain he's speaking figuratively, Abner cannot get past his fear of having his tender feet burned. The stubbornness of both the Men's and Women's Protective Associations shows no signs of breaking, even as Squire Skimp insists the women will eventually beg their husbands to return home. As Grandpap Spears arrives at the Jot 'Em Down store, the standoff continues with no resolution in sight.

  14. Women Lock Men out of Homes

    Sep 2, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: February 16, 1940 Lum #258, "Women Lock Men out of Homes," finds Pine Ridge in turmoil as the Men's Protective Association faces an unexpected rebellion. The wives of Pine Ridge have formed their own Women's Protective Association and gone on strike, refusing to cook, clean, or do any housework. Abner arrives at the Jot 'Em Down Store eating sardines and crackers for breakfast because his wife Lizabeth won't cook for him anymore. The situation is dire throughout town - even Luke Spears' restaurant is closed because his wife is striking, and Ezra Seastunk has been spotted doing the milking himself. As hungry men gather at the store, Squire Skimp, who started the whole Men's Protective Association idea, tries to maintain solidarity among the brothers. He calls for a secret meeting at Walt Beech's sawmill to decide their next move, insisting this is a battle of wits they cannot afford to lose. However, Grandpap, Abner, and the others are more concerned with their empty stomachs and mounting farm chores than preserving their independence. The men face a difficult choice between pride and practicality as the strike continues.

  15. Women’s Assoc. Formed

    Sep 1, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: February 14, 1940 Lum #257, "Women's Assoc. Formed," Lum eagerly receives what he believes is a Valentine from Maudy Brooks, the woman he has been trying to court since she moved to town. Despite Abner's skepticism about Maudy's interest—pointing out how she scooted away from Lum at a recent meeting—Lum remains convinced that her Valentine is proof of her affection. He proudly anticipates opening the lace-adorned card, planning to display it prominently in his home as a token of her feelings. However, when Lum finally opens the envelope, his romantic hopes are crushed. Instead of a sweet declaration of love, Maudy has sent him a comic Valentine filled with insulting verse mocking his appearance, particularly his handlebar mustache. The cruel poem compares his face to "a plate of hash" and flatly states she wants no part of him. A humiliated and furious Lum tears up the card, threatens Abner to keep quiet about the embarrassment, and declares he's ready to join the Men's Protective Association—though he quickly learns membership requires being married.

  16. Sos Men’s Association

    Sep 1, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: February 12, 1940 Lum #256, "Sos Men's Association," The Men's Protective Association, formed by the married men of Pine Ridge to defend themselves against their wives' demands, is gaining momentum under Squire Skinner's leadership. Having successfully pressured Abner's wife Elizabeth into signing their pledge of cooperation, the organization now faces a test of loyalty when brother member Erv Hanley calls the Jot 'Em Down store seeking groceries on credit. While Abner wants to help a fellow association member, Lum refuses to extend credit to Erv since his account is months past due. The situation puts Abner in an awkward position as he tries to turn down his "brother" without directly rejecting him. Meanwhile, Squire arrives to announce he's designated February 12th as the association's official holiday, declaring Abraham Lincoln their patron saint as "the great emancipator" who freed slaves just as they're freeing men from female domination. The organization plans a meeting at the schoolhouse where a fellow from the county seat will teach self-defense lessons, as the men of Pine Ridge continue their campaign for domestic independence.

  17. Men’s Protective Association

    Aug 31, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: February 9, 1940 Lum #255, "Men's Protective Association," Abner finds himself in a predicament after the married men of Pine Ridge organize a Men's Protective Association to defend themselves against their wives' unreasonable demands. Testing the strength of the new club, Abner boldly declared to his wife Elizabeth that he is master of their house. Now he's living alone in one of his and Lum's tourist cabins, too afraid to go home and face the consequences. At the Jot 'Em Down store, Abner complains to Lum and Grandpappy Spears about the mess they've gotten him into, while Lum points out that the association is supposed to protect its members. When Squire Skimp, the organization's "Defender," arrives and delivers an impassioned speech about man's independence and freedom from marital slavery, he proposes a bold solution. The association will march to Abner's house in a torchlight parade and demand that Elizabeth recognize her husband's constitutional rights. Despite Abner's initial enthusiasm for watching the confrontation from a safe distance up a tree, Squire insists he'll be leading the parade himself.

  18. Standing up to Lizabeth

    Aug 31, 2026 · 15 min

    Originally Aired: February 7, 1940 Lum #254, "Standing up to Lizabeth," finds the usually mild-mannered Lum Edwards attempting to assert himself in his relationship with the formidable Lizabeth. The episode explores the classic struggle of a man trying to stand his ground against a strong-willed woman who typically gets her way. As Lum contemplates taking a firmer stance, he must wrestle with his own doubts and the potential consequences of challenging Lizabeth's authority. The conflict builds as Lum considers whether he has the courage to actually follow through with his plan to be more assertive. His deliberations reveal both his desire for more independence and his underlying fear of upsetting the delicate balance in their relationship. The episode captures the humor and humanity of this timeless domestic dilemma as Lum weighs his options and contemplates what standing up to Lizabeth might really mean for their future together.

  19. New Girl in Town

    Aug 30, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: February 5, 1940 In Lum #253, "New Girl in Town," Lum is nursing his wounded pride after the widow Florence Beaumont left Pine Ridge to return to Nashville last week. Declaring himself done with romance forever, he proclaims to Abner at the Jot 'Em Down Store that he's a lone wolf who can't depend on women. Abner tries to convince him that married life has its comforts, painting a picture of domestic bliss with his wife Lizabeth, but his timing couldn't be worse. When Lizabeth calls the store and tears into Abner over the phone, it becomes clear that marital harmony isn't all it's cracked up to be. As Grandpap Spears and Squire Skimp drop by, each man shares his own tales of domestic strife. Grandpap can't attend lodge meeting because his wife Charity has instituted new rules, while Squire complains that the women's organizations in town are giving wives too much authority. The gathering becomes an impromptu men's club of sorts, with Lum feeling increasingly vindicated in his decision to remain single as his married friends detail their trials and tribulations at home.

  20. Lum Mourns Loss of Widder

    Aug 30, 2026 · 13 min

    Originally Aired: February 2, 1940 Lum #252, "Lum Mourns Loss of Widder," In the Jot'em Down store, Lum is despondent over the disappearance of the Widow Beaumont, desperately trying to figure out where she's gone. He confides in Abner that he's been calling Nashville long distance with no luck. The irony of Lum's predicament becomes painfully clear: just weeks earlier, he had paid Squire Skimp twenty-five dollars to run the widow and her seven children out of Pine Ridge. But somewhere along the way, Lum fell in love with her, and when he finally decided to propose marriage, he discovered the Squire had already completed his job—posing as the chief of police and threatening to arrest her for vagrancy and put her children in an orphanage if she didn't leave town immediately. Now heartbroken, Lum vows to find the widow if he has to "burn the woods and sift the ashes" or "go to the end of the world," much to Abner's literal-minded confusion. Lum wants to horsewhip the Squire for scaring her away, but Abner keeps reminding him that he's the one who hired the Squire in the first place, making any revenge impossible. Despite Abner's practical advice to forget about her, Lum insists he'll carry this scar on his heart until his dying day.

  21. Widder Leaves Town

    Aug 29, 2026 · 15 min

    Originally Aired: January 31, 1940 Lum #251, "Widder Leaves Town," After initially being horrified by the Widow Beaumont's seven children when she arrived from Nashville expecting to marry him, Lum has undergone a dramatic change of heart. Abner and Grandpappy Spears congratulate themselves on their successful intervention, having convinced Lum of the joys of family life. Now Lum can't do enough for the youngsters, bringing them candy, playing with them constantly, and even traveling to the county seat to buy toys since they're stuck inside with whooping cough. Abner reports that Lum has gone from trying to pay Squire Skimp twenty-five dollars to run the family out of town to being the happiest fellow around, completely smitten with both the widow and her children. While waiting for Lum to return from his toy-shopping trip, Abner and Grandpap settle in at the Jot 'Em Down store for a friendly game of checkers. However, their game quickly deteriorates into a heated argument over who gets which color and who moves first, with the two old-timers bickering like children themselves over the rules and trading insults.

  22. Lum Likes Widder and Kids

    Aug 29, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: January 29, 1940 Lum #250, "Lum Likes Widder and Kids," Lum finds himself in quite a predicament after inviting Mrs. Beaumont and her children from Tennessee to Pine Ridge as a prospective bride. While Lum was away, Abner moved the widow and her youngsters into Lum's house on Doc Miller's advice, since the children have whooping cough and the tourist cabins are too cold. Now Lum is furious, hiding out in the tourist cabins himself and desperately trying to avoid the family he originally invited to marry into. His anger only intensifies when the children accidentally turn loose all his livestock, scattering them across the community. At the Jot 'Em Down Store, Abner and Grandpappy Spears discuss Lum's situation and come to an interesting conclusion. Despite Lum's protests and repeated attempts to back out of marriage proposals, they believe marrying the widow would be the best thing for him. Abner has come to see Mrs. Beaumont as a sensible woman who genuinely cares for Lum, and both men agree that Lum needs a family to break him out of his rigid bachelor ways. When Lum arrives complaining about his scattered livestock, they confront him directly with their recommendation, but Lum adamantly refuses.

  23. Widder and Family Move In

    Aug 28, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: January 26, 1940 Lum #249, "Widder and Family Move In," Lum finds himself in a desperate situation. Though he's decided not to marry Florence Beaumont, the supposedly wealthy widow who came to Pine Ridge in response to his marriage proposal, she remains quarantined in town after one of her children contracts whooping cough. Terrified of being sued for breach of promise after a previous costly lawsuit, Lum attempts an outrageous scheme to make the widow lose interest in him. He tells her he suffers from fits and decides to stage a convincing episode in front of the tourist camp. The performance goes spectacularly wrong when Lum ends up soaking wet, prompting Abner and Cedric to mistakenly believe he attempted suicide by jumping in the mill pond. When a drenched Lum arrives at the Jot 'Em Down store demanding dry clothes, the confusion deepens. Grandpap reveals what actually happened during Lum's fake fit, explaining how the widow responded to the theatrical display. As Lum warms himself by the stove in an oversized shirt, his friends try to understand his increasingly frantic attempts to escape matrimony.

  24. Quarantined in Cabins

    Aug 28, 2026 · 14 min

    Originally Aired: January 24, 1940 Lum #248, "Quarantined in Cabins," Lum faces a matrimonial disaster when Mrs. Franz Forrest Beaumont, a wealthy widow, arrives in Pine Ridge with seven unruly children in tow after Lum rashly proposed marriage through a newspaper advertisement. The red-headed widow never mentioned her large family in her ad, and now she's telling everyone around town that she and Lum are getting married, while her wild children wreak havoc in the tourist cabins, burning stove wood in bonfires and throwing rocks at passersby. Desperate to escape both the marriage and the constant teasing from townspeople calling him "Papa," Lum turns to Squire Skimp for help. Squire Skimp offers to make Lum appear so ridiculous that Mrs. Beaumont will leave town voluntarily, guaranteeing success for twenty-five dollars. However, Lum worries about what humiliating scheme the Squire has in mind, while also fearing a breach of promise lawsuit if he simply refuses to marry the widow. With Abner already over at the cabins trying to talk sense into Mrs. Beaumont, Lum must decide whether to trust Squire's mysterious plan or face the consequences.

  25. Lum to Be a Family Man

    Aug 27, 2026 · 15 min

    Originally Aired: January 22, 1940 Lum #247, "Lum to Be a Family Man," Lum anxiously awaits the arrival of Florence Beaumont, a wealthy widow whose newspaper advertisement for a husband he answered by letter. She sent a telegram saying she would arrive Monday to meet him in person, and Lum has spent the day frantically preparing, making multiple trips to the barber shop for hair tonic and having his gray hair dyed black with what appears to be shoe polish. Dressed uncomfortably in a too-tight collar and tie, he waits at the Jot 'Em Down store with his partner Abner, growing increasingly worried as the day wears on with no sign of Florence arriving by train, bus, or mail carrier. As the afternoon passes, Abner discovers the extent of Lum's deception in his letter to Florence. Lum claimed to be independently wealthy himself, describing a grand plantation with grazing cattle and cotton fields, when in reality he only owns two cows and can merely see his neighbor's cotton across the road. Despite these exaggerations and his increasingly absurd appearance, Lum remains optimistic that once Florence arrives, he can make her fall in love with him and they'll travel the world together with her fortune.